I have struggled with the answer when asked, "What do you do?" and it isn't work-related. Ultimately, we settled on that I find things and untangle things. But I also read (a lot), pretend to wake surf, and watch Hallmark films.
So so good! Orla and Kate are long-time best friends off on a girls' weekend away. Kate is a bit of a player who is trying to get back at her soon-to-be-ex, causing her to spend frivolously and do drugs and hook-ups. Orla is a new mom ex...
tagged:
2024, audible-books, five-stars, thriller, and thoughtful
Parts were a screaming 5 and parts were like “what?” And just irritated me. It is a Groundhog Day premise about a family of four - the mom is caught up in her own life and missing all that is going on around her with her kids and then he...
tagged:
2024, audible-books, fiction, four-stars, and thoughtful
I used to be really busy and feel like I wasn’t getting to spend nearly enough time with my girls. And then guess what happened? I got laid off. So after 4 months of working for a company that I felt like I was sacrificing too much for, they gave me 2 weeks severance and my accrued vacation and sent me on my way.
The next day I went and spent the day in the sun, playing in the pool and visiting with my uncle and sister. It was AWESOME. Even though my sunburn doesn’t feel quit so awesome now.
And on Friday – the girls and I ran several errands. Including getting me a new phone number. It was very frustrating having to say goodbye to my phone number of 6 years all because I would have had to take on the terms of the contract with my old phone number. It was not worth 20 months without a decent phone. My job would have let me buy my old iPhone for $300 but I could get a new one for $200. Instead, I’m using an old blackberry that has letters that don’t work and the volume is weak. But, it is better than spending a huge chunk of change when I just lost my job. So I’ll adapt.
I’ve reached out to several people about job possibilities, but I haven’t made my list yet of the top 10 places I would like to work. It’s been a shocking adjustment for me. Totally and completely unexpected.
Today I am not viewing it as a bad, “woe is me” type of situation – yet. The first night, I didn’t sleep and it kept running it through my mind what I did wrong. But, now I feel like it was a blessing. I wasn’t happy only spending 1 1/2 – 2 hours a night with my girls (unless we let them stay up late). It was frustrating not having time to run any errands. We had not gone to the grocery store for several weeks. When I was home, I was tired and discouraged because of things that had been said to me that I felt were totally uncalled for. Although, I was excited about the potential of the “new” company and the series A funding that had been raised.
So now I’m looking for a job, spending lots more time with my girls, hoping to scrub and organize the house, weeding (instead of using weed killer), and planning on working out at least some.
Hopefully, it will also translate into more time to blog and hopefully more time to pursue photography. I even plan on creating a photography Facebook fan page.
Thank you so much for all of the encouraging comments last week on the blog. It helps to know that we are not alone and it is okay to let things go.
… sometimes you have to be willing to let some things go.
My uncle painted a painting called “The Responsible Woman“. I look at it every single day, as it is the picture hanging above my dresser.
When I look at it, I’m reminded that I am not the only mom or woman with possibly more on her plate than she can easily handle. I’m not the only one juggling a a family, full time day job, church responsibilities, a home, a yard, an extended family, friends, a blog, parent groups, the desire to workout (notice it is just the desire right now) – to name just the biggest chunks of responsibilities.
I’m always jealous when I look at some women around me who seem to coast through everything. They always have perfect make-up, they are filling their days playing with their kids and leisurely working in their yard. These same women will stay in their workout clothes for the better part of the day because they are comfortable and they are getting sun while playing with their kids.
And then I realize, they are doing what works for them to maintain the balance that we all seek. In order to find that balance, we have to realize somethings just have to go. They don’t have to go permanently, necessarily, but long enough that we can get back on our feet.
This year I had great plans to go to BlogHer ’11 in San Diego. I was so excited because it is not far from my brother and sister-in-law’s home. It felt like such a great time to take the kids down and let them stay and play with their cousins while I enjoyed the conference. Or for Scott and the girls to come down and play in San Diego. I kept looking forward to it but I would get a bit of a pit in my stomach. With all that has been going on, it didn’t really make sense for me to pursue a mostly solo vacation. With limited days of vacation saved up with the new job, my sister-in-law’s cancer treatment, and the long hours I’ve been putting in I knew it wasn’t fair for me to go. I was so lucky to have sold my ticket minutes before the deadline of 5 PM on July 1st. I sold it for less than I paid, but at least I sold it.
My house is not nearly as clean as I like it, but I’m trying to get the kids to learn how to help around the house. Which means I can’t really follow behind them and do it over again because that doesn’t send the right message – plus I just don’t have time to manage them and redo.
Laundry gets done once a week and sometimes it will sit in the laundry basket (folded) for several days. Or until I am sorting laundry the next time and need the basket. (Oh the shame).
Scott sprays round up on my weeds (which is totally un-organic of me) but it saves me the time of weeding every weekend. I still have to get the weeds that are close to flowers, but I can often convince the girls to do that.
My workout schedule is non-existent. This is one of those areas that I have let go and am going to require some other adjustments so that I can fit it back in. Otherwise 40 is not going to be a happy birthday.
The final thing that my responsibilities have affected is the amount of time I get to spend blogging. Rather than posting 4-5 times a week, I’ve had to scale back. I’m going to work on finding a happy medium somewhere between the once a week I have been doing and the five times a week I was doing. But, it will take some time to get into my groove. I also haven’t had time to read and comment on blogs – which makes my heart hurt. I feel like I’m missing out on relationships with in-real-life blogging friends and virtual blogging friends. I’m going to somehow remedy that as well.
Sure, it sucks to have my clothes in a laundry basket for a week, or in a pile on my closet floor. I would love to have a dust free, stack free, always vacuumed home. Having a well manicured yard that I could be proud of is a dream. But for now, I will make sacrifices so that one day, I will have my dreams.
____________
In order to balance all of your responsibilities, what do you let go?
Here I am sitting at a blog conference and thinking about how my blog has evolved over the past year and what I really wanted it to be about. And I think it is time to refine my focus and redirect my posts.
Lately, when I have time to post, I quickly post about life and what we are doing. I feel like it has turned into a typical mom blog travel log and that was and is not my purpose. I need to share more about how we are doing, what we are sacrificing, how we are growing and how we are coping with the struggles.
So going forward, please provide me feedback and patience as I shift gears back to what inspired me to create this blog.
The horses are in the gate, my bet is placed and I’m praying for the trifecta.
After many hours of gymnastics, it finally paid off on Saturday.
Jade has worked extremely hard. She has learned focus. Each day she practices discipline. At night she wants to sleep in the splits. During her bedtime prayers, she thanks Heavenly Father for the good day she had at gymnastics. (She does the same on days of dance). There have been many restless nights due to “rips” or blisters that have had the skin ripped off of them. Over the past 5 years there have been only a handful of days where she complained about going to the gym, a few more times that she has just been too tired to go but goes anyway. Her level of commitment has grown over the years and she loves being a gymnast.
Saturday was the Level 4 State Meet. There were three session – she qualified for the most advanced session with her teammates.
Her first event was the vault. The mat was harder than the girls are used to. As each one practiced their vault, they would walk back and rub their backs in pain. But, they all did a great job. Jade got one of her best scores on the vault.
After that was the uneven bar – typically one of her best events. Instead, it was the only event she didn’t score well or place in. After the meet, my mom asked her if there was a point in the meet that she felt like she was doing the best that she had done. Strangely – the moment she felt the very best was during the bars. And she was so excited that her coach told her that she had done “Awesome”. Guess she was as confused by her low score as the rest of us were.
Third event – balance beam. She looked so solid on her warm up – which doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll be solid during her turn. But, wow, she nailed it. 9.625 – her best score on the beam EVER. But do you think she knew her score? Or that she would place at all? She didn’t have a clue. When they were announcing the awards, she just sat not expecting to place at all. Then when they were down to the 3rd place, she started to look a little disappointed – like she hadn’t placed. Then when they announced her name as 1st place, she went to second and had to be corrected. She was grinning from ear to ear with excitement.
Finally on floor she was doing fantastic and messed up on her tumbling run and didn’t make a perfectly straight line and it messed her up. So she ended up in 5th place.
All in all, she ended the meet with a 5th place overall and forever has the bragging rights of being a “State Champion” on beam.
We’re now into the long 10 1/2 hours a week of gymnastics workouts. It will be interesting to see how she ends up embracing it.
*** Winning isn’t everything, I do know that. But, it definitely helps to receive recognition or reward for consistent hard work and dedication. Sometimes we won’t get that reward, but it is wonderful when we do.
